WASHINGTON D.C. — During a press conference on Wednesday, President Trump revealed that his penis is circumcised, in order to “proudly display loyalty to the Jewish people and to the great state of Israel.”
On Tuesday, President Trump provoked ire from the Jewish community when he accused Jewish Democrats of “disloyalty.” In a meeting with reporters the following day, he was asked to clarify his remarks.
“I mean what I said. The Democrats hate Jews, and so Jews who vote Democrat are disloyal.”
“But sir, how exactly has your administration shown solidarity with the Jewish people?” one CNN reporter inquired.
“Well, we moved our embassy to Jerusalem, we support Israeli rule over Golan Heights, and look at this!” President Trump responded, as he proceeded to unzip his trousers, revealing his flaccid, circumcised penis. “Do you need any more proof that no one loves Israel more than Donald Trump?” he asked with a thumbs up.
“I was absolutely appalled,” an anonymous correspondent for The Hill told The Millennial Snowflake. “I have never seen anything like it. He was literally pandering with his pecker! It was dick demagoguery!”
Several journalistic outlets, including CNN, The New York Times, and The Washington Post, are providing psychiatric care for those affected by the incident.