Politics

The Millennial Snowflake Agrees to Make Memes for Bloomberg Campaign

ATLANTA — Recently, we at headquarters received a call from Mike Bloomberg’s presidential campaign. A representative asked our CEO if we would consider making “dank memes” on behalf of Mr. Bloomberg

After some hesitation, we decided to accept their generous offer.

“The truth is that we have no choice,” we said in a press release. “And frankly, socialist political commentary just doesn’t pay the bills anymore. We aren’t thrilled about it, but money makes the world go round.”

“We understand that some of our viewers may object to our decision,” the statement continued. “But before you accuse us of ‘selling out,’ remind yourself that under late stage capitalism, everything and everyone has a price. This kind, generous philanthropist just happened to make a good offer.”

That being said, we hope you enjoy our new content, and remember: Mike will get it done!

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