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Report: Thanksgiving Meal Took a Racist Turn Out of Fucking Nowhere

White people enjoy thanksgiving meal, while sharing their casual racist views.

MILTON, GEORGIA — The turkey was cooked to near perfection, the cranberry sauce was just the right amount of sweet, the corn and mash potatoes were a hit, and cousin Ryan was back from from his service overseas. The food was excellent and the conversations were pleasant enough. Then out of fucking nowhere things turned wildly racist.

Somehow or another, Freaknik — the annual spring break festival for students primarily from Atlanta’s historically black colleges and universities — came up during the meal. That’s when Uncle Jarod explained that the event was banned inside Atlanta city limits and Cumberland Mall would even shut down because of a major spike in theft from its shops. Of course, Jarod then added that he “hates to say it, but stealing is just what they do.” The other crusty old white people at the table were quick to agree. With grandpa fuckhead adding that “they are just showing their true colors by taking what doesn’t belong to them.”

At press time, the family was busy talking about how Black Lives Matter is a terrorist organization as their “millennial snowflake” relative left the table triggered and now more than ever, fully came to understand exactly how that walking cheeto wound up in the Oval Office.

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