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220LocalPathetic Beta Gets A Side of Shame with His Sad Salad
Frequent customers of the salad chain Salad Tosser report that Donathan Jildo, a pathetic beta, ordered a sad salad indicative of a...
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2031PoliticsTrump Settles for Large ‘KEEP OUT’ Sign Along Southern Border
WASHINGTON D.C. — In his speech at the Rose Garden, President Trump announced that the longest shutdown in United States history will...
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219LocalUber Driver Has Book In His Head, Doesn’t Know How to Write It, but You Could and He’ll Share The Profits With You!
ATLANTA, GA — After hearing his passenger was an author and experiencing a brief moment of hesitation, Uber driver Tom White told...
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239PoliticsTSA Agent Bids Cocaine Smuggler ‘Welcome Aboard’ Amid Govt Shutdown
RONALD REAGAN WASHINGTON NATIONAL AIRPORT — Andrew Harrison, who works for the Transportation Security Administration (TSA), reportedly welcomed a cocaine smuggler aboard...
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202Top StoryEXCLUSIVE: Letter from the Frontlines of the War on Christmas
Recently, The Millennial Snowflake Research Center (MSRC) recovered some letters sent by soldiers to their families during the War on Christmas. The...